Skip to main content

Full text of "Reflections On The Right Use Of School Studies With A View To The Love Of God"

See other formats


Reflections on the Right Use 
of School Studies with a View 
to the Love of Qod 


The key to a Christian conception of studies is the realiza¬ 
tion that prayer consists of attention. It is the orientation of 
all the attention of which the soul is capable toward God. 
The quality of the attention counts for much in the quality 
of the prayer. Warmth of heart cannot make up for it. 

The highest part of the attention only makes contact with 
God, when prayer is intense and pure enough for such a 
contact to be established; but the whole attention is turned 
toward God. 

Of course school exercises only develop a lower kind of 
attention. Nevertheless, they are extremely effective in in¬ 
creasing the power of attention that will be available at the 
time of prayer, on condition that they are carried out with 
a view to this purpose and this purpose alone. 

Although people seem to be unaware of it today, the de¬ 
velopment of the faculty of attention forms the real object 
and almost the sole interest of studies. Most school tasks have 


105 



WAITING FOR GOD 


a certain intrinsic interest as well, but such an interest is 
secondary. All tasks that really call upon the power of at¬ 
tention are interesting for the same reason and to an almost 
equal degree. 

School children and students who love God should never 
say: “For my part I like mathematics”; “I like French”; “I 
like Greek.” They should leam to like all these subjects, 
because all of them develop that faculty of attention which, 
directed toward God, is the very substance of prayer. 

If we have no aptitude or natural taste for geometry, this 
does not mean that our faculty for attention will not be 
developed by wrestling with a problem or studying a 
theorem. On the contrary it is almost an advantage. 

It does not even matter much whether we succeed in find¬ 
ing the solution or understanding the proof, although it is 
important to try really hard to do so. Never in any case 
whatever is a genuine effort of the attention wasted. It 
always has its effect on the spiritual plane and in conse¬ 
quence on the lower one of the intelligence, for all spiritual 
light lightens the mind. 

If we concentrate our attention on trying to solve a prob¬ 
lem of geometry, and if at the end of an hour we are no 
nearer to doing so than at the beginning, we have neverthe¬ 
less been making progress each minute of that hour in 
another more mysterious dimension. Without our knowing 
or feeling it, this apparently barren effort has brought more 
light into the soul. The result will one day be discovered in 
prayer. Moreover, it may very likely be felt in some depart¬ 
ment of the intelligence in no way connected with mathe¬ 
matics. Perhaps he who made the unsuccessful effort will 

106 



SCHOOL STUDIES 


one day be able to grasp the beauty of a line of Racine more 
vividly on account of it. But it is certain that this effort will 
bear its fruit in prayer. There is no doubt whatever about 
that. 

Certainties of this kind are experimental. But if we do not 
believe in them before experiencing them, if at least we do 
not behave as though we believed in them, we shall never 
have the experience that leads to such certainties. There is 
a kind of contradiction here. Above a given level this is the 
case with all useful knowledge concerning spiritual prog¬ 
ress. If we do not regulate our conduct by it before having 
proved it, if we do not hold on to it for a long time by faith 
alone, a faith at first stormy and without light, we shall 
never transform it into certainty. Faith is the indispensable 
condition. 

The best support for faith is the guarantee that if we ask 
our Father for bread, he does not give us a stone. Quite 
apart from explicit religious belief, every time that a human 
being succeeds in making an effort of attention with the 
sole idea of increasing his grasp of truth, he acquires a 
greater aptitude for grasping it, even if his effort produces 
no visible fruit. An Eskimo story explains the origin of light 
as follows: “In the eternal darkness, the crow, unable to 
find any food, longed for light, and the earth was il¬ 
lumined.” If there is a real desire, if the thing desired is 
really light, the desire for light produces it. There is a real 
desire when there is an effort of attention. It is really light 
that is desired if all other incentives are absent. Even if our 
efforts of attention seem for years to be producing no result, 
one day a light that is in exact proportion to them will flood 

107 



WAITING FOR GOD 


the soul. Every effort adds a little gold to a treasure no 
power on earth can take away. The useless efforts made by 
the Cure d’Ars, for long and painful years, in his attempt 
to learn Latin bore fruit in the marvelous discernment that 
enabled him to see the very soul of his penitents behind their 
words and even their silences. 

Students must therefore work without any wish to gain 
good marks, to pass examinations, to win school successes; 
without any reference to their natural abilities and tastes; 
applying themselves equally to all their tasks, with the idea 
that each one will help to form in them the habit of that 
attention which is the substance of prayer. When we set out 
to do a piece of work, it is necessary to wish to do it cor¬ 
rectly, because such a wish is indispensable in any true 
effort. Underlying this immediate objective, however, our 
deep purpose should aim solely at increasing the power of 
attention with a view to prayer; as, when we write, we draw 
the shape of the letter on paper, not with a view to the 
shape, but with a view to the idea we want to express. To 
make this the sole and exclusive purpose of our studies is 
the first condition to be observed if we axe to put them to 
the right use. 

The second condition is to take great pains to examine 
squarely and to contemplate attentively and slowly each 
school task in which we have failed, seeing how unpleasing 
and second rate it is, without seeking any excuse or over¬ 
looking any mistake or any of our tutor’s corrections, trying 
to get down to the origin of each fault. There is a great 
temptation to do the opposite, to give a sideways glance at 
the corrected exercise if it is bad and to hide it forthwith. 

108 



SCHOOL STUDIES 


Most of us do this nearly always. We have to withstand this 
temptation. Incidentally, moreover, nothing is more neces¬ 
sary for academic success, because, despite all our efforts, 
we work without making much progress when we refuse to 
give our attention to the faults we have made and our tutor’s 
corrections. 

Above all it is thus that we can acquire the virtue of 
humility, and that is a far more precious treasure than all 
academic progress. From this point of view it is perhaps 
even more useful to contemplate our stupidity than our sin. 
Consciousness of sin gives us the feeling that we are evil, 
and a kind of pride sometimes finds a place in it. When we 
force ourselves to fix the gaze, not only of our eyes but of 
our souls, upon a school exercise in which we have failed 
through sheer stupidity, a sense of our mediocrity is borne 
in upon us with irresistible evidence. No knowledge is more 
to be desired. If we can arrive at knowing this truth with 
all our souls we shall be well established on the right founda¬ 
tion. 

If these two conditions are perfectly carried out there is 
no doubt that school studies are quite as good a road to 
sanctity as any other. 

To carry out the second, it is enough to wish to do so. 
This is not the case with the first. In order really to pay 
attention, it is necessary to know how to set about it. 

Most often attention is confused with a kind of muscular 
effort. If one says to one’s pupils: “Now you must pay at¬ 
tention,” one sees them contracting their brows, holding 
their breath, stiffening their muscles. If after two minutes 
they are asked what they have been paying attention to, 

109 



WAITING FOR GOD 


they cannot reply. They have been concentrating on noth¬ 
ing. They have not been paying attention. They have been 
contracting their muscles. 

We often expend this kind of muscular effort on our 
studies. As it ends by making us tired, we have the impres¬ 
sion that we have been working. That is an illusion. Tired¬ 
ness has nothing to do with work. Work itself is the useful 
effort, whether it is tiring or not. This kind of muscular 
effort in work is entirely barren, even if it is made with the 
best of intentions. Good intentions in such cases are among 
those that pave the way to hell. Studies conducted in such 
a way can sometimes succeed academically from the point 
of view of gaining marks and passing examinations, but that 
is in spite of the effort and thanks to natural gifts; moreover 
such studies are never of any use. 

Will power, the kind that, if need be, makes us set our 
teeth and endure suffering, is the principal weapon of the 
apprentice engaged in manual work. But, contrary to the 
usual belief, it has practically no place in study. The intelli¬ 
gence can only be led by desire. For there to be desire, there 
must be pleasure and joy in the work. The intelligence only 
grows and bears fruit in joy. The joy of learning is as indis¬ 
pensable in study as breathing is in running. Where it is 
lacking there are no real students, but only poor caricatures 
of apprentices who, at the end of their apprenticeship, will 
not even have a trade. 

It is the part played by joy in our studies that makes of 
them a preparation for spiritual life, for desire directed to¬ 
ward God is the only power capable of raising the soul. Or 
rather, it is God alone who comes down and possesses the 


o 



SCHOOL STUDIES 


soul, but desire alone draws God down. He only comes to 
those who ask him to come; and he cannot refuse to come 
to those who implore him long, often, and ardently. 

Attention is an effort, the greatest of all efforts perhaps, 
but it is a negative effort. Of itself, it does not involve tired¬ 
ness. When we become tired, attention is scarcely possible 
any more, unless we have already had a good deal of prac¬ 
tice. It is better to stop working altogether, to seek some 
relaxation, and then a little later to return to the task; we 
have to press on and loosen up alternately, just as we breathe 
in and out. 

Twenty minutes of concentrated, untired attention is in¬ 
finitely better than three hours of the kind of frowning ap¬ 
plication that leads us to say with a sense of duty done: “I 
have worked well! ” 

But, in spite of all appearances, it is also far more difficult. 
Something in our soul has a far more violent repugnance 
for true attention than the flesh has for bodily fatigue. This 
something is much more closely connected with evil than is 
the flesh. That is why every time that we really concentrate 
our attention, we destroy the evil in ourselves. If we con¬ 
centrate with this intention, a quarter of an hour of atten¬ 
tion is better than a great many good works. 

Attention consists of suspending our thought, leaving it 
detached, empty, and ready to be penetrated by the object; 
it means holding in our minds, within reach of this thought, 
but on a lower level and not in contact with it, the diverse 
knowledge we have acquired which we are forced to make 
use of. Our thought should be in relation to all particular 
and already formulated thoughts, as a man on a mountain 



WAITING FOR GOD 


who, as he looks forward, sees also below him, without ac¬ 
tually looking at them, a great many forests and plains. 
Above all our thought should be empty, waiting, not seek¬ 
ing anything, but ready to receive in its naked truth the 
object that is to penetrate it. 

All wrong translations, all absurdities in geometry prob¬ 
lems, all clumsiness of style, and all faulty connection of 
ideas in compositions and essays, all such things are due to 
the fact that thought has seized upon some idea too hastily, 
and being thus prematurely blocked, is not open to the 
truth. The cause is always that we have wanted to be too 
active; we have wanted to carry out a search. This can be 
proved every time, for every fault, if we trace it to its root. 
There is no better exercise than such a tracing down of our 
faults, for this truth is one to be believed only when we have 
experienced it hundreds and thousands of times. This is the 
way with all essential truths. 

We do not obtain the most precious gifts by going in 
search of them but by waiting for them. Man cannot dis¬ 
cover them by his own powers, and if he sets out to seek for 
them he will find in their place counterfeits of which he will 
be unable to discern the falsity. 

The solution of a geometry problem does not in itself 
constitute a precious gift, but the same law applies to it be¬ 
cause it is the image of something precious. Being a little 
fragment of particular truth, it is a pure image of the unique, 
eternal, and living Truth, the very Truth that once in a 
human voice declared: “I am the Truth.” 

Every school exercise, thought of in this way, is like a 
sacrament. 


112 



SCHOOL STUDIES 


In every school exercise there is a special way of waiting 
upon truth, setting our hearts upon it, yet not allowing our¬ 
selves to go out in search of it. There is a way of giving our 
attention to the data of a problem in geometry without try¬ 
ing to find the solution or to the words of a Latin or Greek 
text without trying to arrive at the meaning, a way of wait¬ 
ing, when we are writing, for the right word to come of it¬ 
self at the end of our pen, while we merely reject all inade¬ 
quate words. 

Our first duty toward school children and students is to 
make known this method to them, not only in a general way 
but in the particular form that bears on each exercise. It is 
not only the duty of those who teach them but also of their 
spiritual guides. Moreover the latter should bring out in a 
brilliantly clear light the correspondence between the atti¬ 
tude of the intelligence in each one of these exercises and the 
position of the soul, which, with its lamp well filled with oil, 
awaits the Bridegroom’s coming with confidence and desire. 
May each loving adolescent, as he works at his Latin prose, 
hope through this prose to come a little nearer to the instant 
when he will really be the slave—faithfully waiting while 
the master is absent, watching and listening—ready to open 
the door to him as soon as he knocks. The master will then 
make his slave sit down and himself serve him with meat. 

Only this waiting, this attention, can move the master to 
treat his slave with such amazing tenderness. When the slave 
has worn himself out in the fields, his master says on his 
return, “Prepare my meal, and wait upon me.” And he con¬ 
siders the servant who only does what he is told to do to be 
unprofitable. To be sure in the realm of action we have to 

"3 



WAITING FOR GOD 


do all that is demanded of us, no matter what effort, weari¬ 
ness, and suffering it may cost, for he who disobeys does not 
love; but after that we are only unprofitable servants. Such 
service is a condition of love, but it is not enough. What 
forces the master to make himself the slave of his slave, and 
to love him, has nothing to do with all that. Still less is it the 
result of a search the servant might have been bold enough 
to undertake on his own initiative. It is only watching, wait¬ 
ing, attention. 

Happy then are those who pass their adolescence and 
youth in developing this power of attention. No doubt they 
are no nearer to goodness than their brothers working in 
fields and factories. They are near in a different way. Peas¬ 
ants and workmen possess a nearness to God of incompara¬ 
ble savor which is found in the depths of poverty, in the 
absence of social consideration and in the endurance of long 
drawn-out sufferings. If, however, we consider the occupa¬ 
tions in themselves, studies are nearer to God because of the 
attention which is their soul. Whoever goes through years 
of study without developing this attention within himself 
has lost a great treasure. 

Not only does the love of God have attention for its sub¬ 
stance; the love of our neighbor, which we know to be the 
same love, is made of this same substance. Those who are 
unhappy have no need for anything in this world but people 
capable of giving them their attention. The capacity to give 
one’s attention to a sufferer is a very rare and difficult thing; 
it is almost a miracle; it is a miracle. Nearly all those who 
think they have this capacity do not possess it. Warmth of 
heart, impulsiveness, pity are not enough. 

114 



SCHOOL STUDIES 


In the first legend of the Grail, it is said that the Grail 
(the miraculous vessel # that satisfies all hunger by virtue of 
the consecrated Host) belongs to the first comer who asks 
the guardian of the vessel, a king three-quarters paralyzed 
by the most painful wound, “What are you going 
through?” 

The love of our neighbor in all its fullness simply means 
being able to say to him: “What are you going through?” 
It is a recognition that the sufferer exists, not only as a unit 
in a collection, or a specimen from the social category la¬ 
beled “unfortunate,” but as a man, exactly like us, who was 
one day stamped with a special mark by affliction. For this 
reason it is enough, but it is indispensable, to know how to 
look at him in a certain way. 

This way of looking is first of all attentive. The soul emp¬ 
ties itself of all its own contents in order to receive into itself 
the being it is looking at, just as he is, in all his truth. 

Only he who is capable of attention can do this. 

So it comes about that, paradoxical as it may seem, a Latin 
prose or a geometry problem, even though they are done 
wrong, may be of great service one day, provided we de¬ 
vote the right kind of effort to them. Should the occasion 
arise, they can one day make us better able to give someone 
in affliction exactly the help required to save him, at the 
supreme moment of his need. 

For an adolescent, capable of grasping this truth and gen¬ 
erous enough to desire this fruit above all others, studies 


• According to some legends the Grail was made of a single stone, in 
color like an emerald. 


"5 



WAITING FOR GOD 


could have their fullest spiritual effect, quite apart from any 
particular religious belief. 

Academic work is one of those fields containing a pearl 
so precious that it is worth while to sell all our possessions, 
keeping nothing for ourselves, in order to be able to acquire 



Simone Weil 


WAITING FOR GOD 


TRANSLATED BY EMMA CRAUFURD 

"With an Introduction by Leslie A. Fiedler 


ffl 

A L 1 

no 


Harper & Row, Publishers, New York 
Grand Rapids, Philadelphia, Si. Louis, San Francisco 
London, Singapore, Sydney, Tokyo, Toronto 





This book was originally published by G. P. Putnam’s Sons and 
is here reprinted by arrangement. 


WAITING FOR GOD 

Copyright © 1951 by G. P. Putnam’s Sons. All rights reserved. 
Printed in the United States of America. No part of this book 
may be used or reproduced in any manner without written per¬ 
mission except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical 
articles and reviews. For information address G. P. Putnam’s 
Sons, 200 Madison Avenue, New York, N.Y. 10016. 

First harper colophon edition published in 1973 

INTERNATIONAL STANDARD BOOK NUMBER! 0-06-090295-7 


96 RRDH 40 39 38 37 36 35 34 33 32 31